Ha. Every time I hear that I remember this sort of joke I heard a while ago. I don't think it's a joke.

There was this God-fearing farmer that lived all his life under strict prayer and obeying all the rules, etc. You know, Flanders.

One day a flood came. Farmer took refuge on the roof of the house and looked up, saying "OK, God, I've been nice all my life, you owe me one, save me".

Nothing happened. No light, no intervention, nothing.

He still believed.

A rescue worker came by in a boat, offering a ride. "No," he said, "God will save me". Later, another boat. "No", he said. Then another boat. "Last chance" said the army man. "No, God will save me, I have no doubt".

Flood came, he died.

Up in Heaven, at the gates, Flanders was definitely irked. "Dude," he said, "what gives? All my life, dedicated, all I did, you let me die?".

"Hmmm," mutters God, picking up a dusty book and flipping pages. "Dude, I have no idea what you are talking about. The book says I sent you three boats."

--

So yes, I can't wait till you're at judgment day and you hear "Dude, I have no idea what you're all about. It says here you had a SWITCH."

My girlfriend used to ask me all kinds of questions like this, and i would tell her "It's a hypothetical situation. Nobody really knows how they would act until they are in that situation."

Then she would go on to make it an impossible question to answer by putting herself into it as a possible victim, whereupon i would infuriate her by repeating myself. In all honesty i couldn't say anything different, but it ceased to become worth the dramatics that then ensued...

So, there is one hypothetical question i can answer: if your significant other takes offense at honesty, would you leave her?

my EX once asked me if she was the best i'd ever slept with...

i replied honestly...

D-cup.

padpadpad

In all fairness, she knows by now I'm gonna be honest so she gets what she asked. In time she learned to never ask what she doesn't want to hear.

Got me rid of those pesky "do you still love me" questions, too. Brutal honesty is the best thing. I really, really wish I could be 100% honest more of the time. But I have to work somewhere, so, I'm sweetened-honest. With a degree in business and a nice engine under the cranium I can weasel my way out of most stuff without lying.

Also, off topic, so, that's it for me.

When I heard this story it was presented as "The moral of this story is: God helps those that help themselves."